11/23 - Thxgiving Thursday!

I'm mourning the loss of a close personal friend

 

I cruise the fast food drive thrus for dates

 

I go to the O2 bars and the body exhibit

 

A lot of people who become boring as they get older euphemize it as becoming "mature and respectful", rationalizing it in as positive a light as possible until they actually believe that they're a better person for being much lamer than they used to be.

 

If I were currently single, I'd take this tongue-in-cheek statement as a challenge and probably have a lot of fun with it.

 

Zero.


That's what smoke breaks are for.

 

Way back when I worked at Subway, before I was promoted to assistant manager, the assistant manager before me didn't even wait for smoke breaks with an employee he hired. They got it on in the freezer.

 

I see you've met my mother. I knew you liked classy broads. Can I call you Daddy? And will you pay me an allowance if I do? ..'cause if not I'm out.

 

Couldn't possibly be that you have convinced yourself of your own bullshit.

 

@ChrisTurk: Conceived On A Smoke Break?
TurkerHub Investigates​

 

Okay, Mr. "self-confessed bad at relationship advice."

 

This question never really turns me on, but I can say with confidence that this is the least turned on I've ever been hearing it.

 

We're all on an mTurk forum at midnight on Thanksgiving. I'm pretty sure the deafening sound of shattering glass is throwing alarm bells on the ISS right now.

 

I can't tell. I've made renovations on my end. It looks like a rave party.

 

back when I was bouncing for a livin', I got hired at this small town Texas bar where the owner was having a whole lotta trouble from a corrupt businessman and his sons that were trying to take over the bar, well I came in and I immediately took my shirt off and roundhouse kicked the shit out of everyone, married the town blond hottie, moved into a barn and lived there til it was time to roundhouse kick somewhere else...

 

Everyone left me alone.

Mostly cuz all my friends are Cowboys fans and just decided to go home after the Chargers put up that last TD.

 

GF is a Cowboy fan, I'm a Charger fan.

Our teams almost never play each other, so it was exciting.

She decided to leave and not watch the game because she has a superstition that watching her team makes her team lose.

I'm surprised the Chargers didn't pull their classic move of being up by 3 touchdowns at halftime and end up losing by less than a field goal.

 

Yeah but why'd you settle for the blond when you could've had the brunette?

 

Romo on Thanksgiving is a blessing. The game sucked though and I don't even like the Cowboys.