@ChrisTurk is the kind of man whose eye contact technically counts as a first date.
Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water? Because if they fell forwards they’d still be in the boat.
Why does a chicken coop only have two doors? Because if it had four doors it would be a chicken sedan.
Doctor you've got you help me, I'm addicted to twitter. Doctor: I don't follow you.
Please add your name at the end of the list if you wanna attend CT's party. Harry Baals Tiny Kox Mike Oxmaul Mike Oxbig Hugh Janus Mike Hunt...
What do you call an Argentinian with a rubber toe? Roberto
What do you call a person who eats other people slowly? A cannibble.
Why couldn't the crocodile get over his ex wife? He was stuck in the Nile
Why was the writer kicked off of the movie set? He was making a scene!
[IMG] What do you call a potato in a hotel room? A suite potato. I told my daughter, "Go to bed, the cows are sleeping in the field." She said,...
I called the Tinnitus helpline today, but it just kept ringing!
I left adderall in my Ford Fiesta Now it’s a Ford Focus
I love to say ‘’mucho” to my Spanish friends. It means a lot to them
Local TV weatherman breaks all of his limbs but insists on coming in to work... ...tune in at 11, to see his four casts
So I read a study the other day claiming that “humans eat more bananas than monkeys” Which to me sounded a bit obvious. I can’t remember the last...
I swallowed a dictionary today. It gave me thesaurus throat I've ever had.
What do you call a depressed man with a robotic arm? A sighborg.
As I put my car in reverse, I thought to myself... "This takes me back."
You know there's no official training for garbagemen? They just pick things up as they go along.
My TV started playing random Netflix shows. It was weird... But I’ve seen Stranger Things
Separate names with a comma.
